IF YOUR BOYFRIEND MAKES JOKES ABOUT YOUR BODY, WEIGHT, EATING DISORDER, RECOVERY, ETC, MAKE A JOKE ABOUT HOW HE’S SINGLE AND THEN WALK OUT THE DOOR BECAUSE THAT IS SOME FUCKEN BULLSHIT AND YOU ARE A BAD BITCH WHO DESERVES BETTER OK OK
Now that I’m an adult I have to make more serious posts
What do you call a man who is short, speaks in rhymes, and is able to spin straw into gold?
No really I’m not joking here, he’s coming for my firstborn in three days and I need to figure out his name.
back when i was in community college my teacher told us the story of a girl in his class who wanted to have sex with her boyfriend but they didnt have any lube so they used mayonnaise. fast forward a couple of days and she’s getting random orgasms during class and driving places so she goes to the doctor and they check her out and guess what they found
okay ill tell you it was maggots. maggots were in her vagina giving her orgasms.